We are so afraid of being rejected and abandoned, of being yelled at or shamed, or of hurting other people, that we tend not to want to go there at all. This is not such a surprise. Often, we are not taught how to handle conflict. Sometimes we are even taught that conflict is bad, wrong and leads to the breakdown of relationships.
But by avoiding conflict, we almost inevitably have to repress our truth or try to be something we are not. This is a slippery slope in relationship - one that often leads to a slow erosion of trust and connection. Suddenly we don't know where the distance came from or why it is so hard to relax around each other.
Luckily, there are tools and skills that can make us feel safe - both in our relationships, and in ourselves - even when conflict arises.
When we're not afraid of conflict, we get to really be ourselves in relationship - without stepping on anyone else's toes. We become able to share our truth in a way that brings connection and trust, and that can even reboot greater tenderness and intimacy.